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She would come and go from the site then finally she has been gone ever since. I saw her for more than just her looks. It is the fact how she takes care of her health and her physical wellness and how nice she dresses and how she cares about how she looks and feels about herself. I have seen a few more women that are younger than I find very attractive and very impressive looking but again it's how they take care of them selfs is what I love is the pride that a woman has. Because most women that are not at that caliber just look so so looking and don't put or show the same effort.

What men need to realize is if a woman of that level needs to do the same. You can't just message a woman because she is very attractive looking. You have to be able to see past her looks. Women are not dumb and the attractive women know why you are messaging them. The problem for me is I do love that they are attractive looking but the reason I message them is more to do with I am impressed by how they take care of their physical health and their wellness.

But women don't know my reason and I get the impression they think I only message because they are Hot looking when that is not so much the case.. I know if I look for the very stunning attractive women I know I'm going to get the type of woman I like that dresses the way I like in a woman as appose to a woman most men think are not their type that they call average. The problem if you notice is on Youtube they have dating coaches and below the video, it's mostly young men making comments about the women that are attractive saying that they only care about money looks and status.

When dating coaches are trying to tell them it's not the case. They think that is why men are not getting attractive women. The dating coaches and society are glorifying women so it makes it hard for other women to get dates. I read in a woman's profile on another site that read in part of her message why is it that men are only going for the model types? There is more to a woman under all that dexterity. You have to see past her looks which I do but I see No results. One problem I see men have to why men are not meeting women is this: There is a clinical psychologist named Dr.

Wendy Walsh who is on KFI radio who is obsessed which talking about dating and relationships and said you need to convey to women that they need to feel safe and that you will not hurt them in any way. She said even if a woman is much older than you. You are still physically stronger and she needs to know that you won't hurt her. One way to convey that is in your profile in part of your message it says I will call to make sure that you make it home safe or I like opening the do for a woman or that you will court her is one way to convey it.

I have an attraction to a much older woman and too much younger women that look older. But say you have an age range a woman can see and it says then you look like a creep to some women.

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Some sites can see everything about them. I bought a Guide book from a guy Online that is easy to follow and uses and the guy will email me and help me with questions or concerns or any problems I'm having. He had bad experiences with Online Dating and finally figured out how to meet beautiful women.

So far I have not had any luck. I know what I want in a woman but for whatever reason the women I like don't respond. I like keeping a record of the women who come and go by having photos of them. I ask the guy helping me about the issue I was having about that and he said he looks at what photos I want. I get the feeling women hate it when I look at all of them.

I need to do that to make sure someone is being honest with me because on a talk show they had a Dating Site on and they said to look at their fingers to see if they have a ring on to indicate that they are married or if it's a Fake photo. Also to see if they have tattoos or not. I don't want a woman with tattoos. One woman did when I got a closer look is why I do this and also because women lie about their age. One woman had down that she was I don't like dishonesty in women when I'm being honest about who I am as a man. I need to do this to see if you are lying or not. And to get a closer look at a woman because it's hard to judge a woman Online based on their looks because when people meet each other they get disappointed because the woman was not what she looked like in her photos or as attractive as her photos looked or appeared to a man.

Most women make it hard because one dating coach said you want to put what you want in a person not what you don't want. And one woman I had an interest in wrote what she didn't want in a man instead of what she wants in a man. It's negative and makes it hard for her to get a date.

There are many reasons why people are not meeting that may have nothing to do with you. Most men don't know how to communicate with women and say some pretty boring and cliche things is why they are not meeting or the things young men say in a woman's Inbox. I have been putting in the effort to meet women. I had what seemed a connection with a very attractive year-old woman but that seemed to fade into the night.

I feel that women are not putting as much effort as they could in responding. If I want the type of woman I am looking for the guy that helps me with the Guide said that you have to be proactive which I find interesting.

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He said you have to find them. Attractive women won't find you. The reason that I find this interesting is a dating coach out of Florida dating coach Corey Wayne said what is great about having a specific profile if you don't have to look. If some read your profile and says that is the type of person I'm looking for then it saves you the time in searching for a woman. The problem with that is that when a Woman views me they are not the attractive type I'm looking for. They are not as caliber as I would like. The women on the site are not my type.

The ones that are do not respond. I'm looking for a quality woman who will treat me good who respects the man I am to her. One issue I have is one woman said to me recently you sent me four messages already I'm not interested to have a good night. The problem I have with that is I sent a course of four messages over time not at once. And it says from what I read reading dating advice if you are on an App to send messages and if you are on a computer to send messages so why would a woman say four is too many if it says how many messages you are supposed to send.

It sounds miss leading to me. I asked the guy that helps me with my Online Dating and he said to send No more than two messages that four is too many. I explained it was over a course of time. Women need to be more proactive and communicative with men. Also on the site, I'm on the guy helping me said if you are in the Carousel feature and a woman wants to meet with you to ask them out right away but they never respond. I notice how you can see when they are Online and what happens is when I go to look at their profile they always go offline to look like they were not there when I clearly saw you Online as if they want the mystery of wondering about you.

I don't know what is up with that maybe you can shed a little light on that as to why women do that with men. I enjoyed reading this article. I hope that you have enjoyed my message of value and I look forward to your message sincerely Dana! Remember if you give out your Cell phone, they can get your location, if your GPS is on. Take every precaution you can so you will be safe. Someone literally took all my photos and information off of 'Our Time' and made a profile on three other dating sites. I found out from people who knew me, that had seen my profile on those sites.

I told 'Our Time' about it. Then 5 men in one week tried to scam me, I set up a email just for replying, they all sent the same messages which I found on a scammers and their emails online. Yes, 'Our Time' is a paid site, and yes they get more B. Ladies, be careful, many of these guys will make your head spin with everything you want to hear, but will give you diseases, rob you blind, use all your money and more.

Take it from me, I have had way too many friends tell me their horror stores. One woman went on a date to Timmies and got stabbed in the parking lot, after telling the guy they had nothing in common. When my profile ends, that will be it for this lady. They use stolen identities and credit cards to create fake profiles to scam people out of money and information to commit illegal crimes. I had only been On Plenty of Fish for 2 months and then I deleted my account. Most seem to just want sex without getting to know me at all.

I am not sure if it was the area I lived in or not. But all women do not sign up to have sex and it is stated on my profile. Wow, I knew women got more attention than men, but WOW. That's so much attention. It's even easier for women to find either a lay or a relation than I thought. Average men are lucky to get a single match in a day. Women are so lucky. Probably because there are more men on the sites? Not sure. But I have been on for 3 days and still see new people. I am about to give up though. It is too hard to read people and I feel like an idiot.

Almost all of those are scammers but some are real women hiding behind masks.

The scammers all ask for money or try some other scam. I need a wife young enough to be able to have babies but below some lower limit 27? I try to help gullible and naive women by chatting for long periods with guys I know are scammers. I know all the signs. If they are chatting with me , they are not stealing from someone else. He asked for my address. I said no. He sent me messages that were rote. Then he said he was going to phone me and I freaked out and told him in a nasty way Karma was going to get him for scamming. I lied and told him I was also married. I told him to get a real job.

Next day I received a death threat with very graphic murder scenes of women. He said this was going to happen to me. What do I do now? I thought I had blocked him on whatsapp but I missed that one. Do I ignore this or go to the local police? Why do women talk to scammers??? They obviously cannot resist communicating with a scammer even though they know full well who it is they are talking to.

Playing with fire ladies! They don't care what they do to you. They will make an example of you. Kill you just for the fun of it. Match was, by far, my worst scammer experience. Multiple scammers, account hacked and Match renewed membership before the expiration date. OKCupid was ok but nothing came of it. OurTime has so far been fun, communicating with a few men now.

If online dating is your choice, research tell tale signs scammers use, i. Reverse image search their photos, I have good success with Tineye. Reverse search phone numbers, emails they give you. Never give personal info. Be wary, be smart, don't be foolish. They do not love you after one day of communicating.

I don't know but after 24 years of marriage and now divorced 5 years it is tough out there! I am 54 year old man and know what I want? Do I really? It is tough for both men and women. I believe being honest from both persons standpoint is extremely important. Then the pictures and profile. We all have our own expectations then meeting up that is can be awkward or a blessing.

Be safe and good luck. If you know why you ended up divorced then work on fixing that problem if you can and go from there! You can just stay single too! Good luck! Thanks , MissDawn. My biggest complaint is not the men, they are people - some are nice, some are not. I just don't respond to rude people. But the companies are the worst, I cancel my profile - they still leave it up so guys can write me, even though I don't check it anymore. And canceling is horrible- they try to convince you to stay, or even say they will stop billing, but still charge you.

They are padding their numbers and people wonder why people don't answer - sometimes they aren't members anymore - it's the site that won't take them down. And I would like to start a site where you can see messages without paying so you can see if you want to respond. And what is up with requiring people to sign up for months? That is unnecessary and exploitive.

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I cannot describe how much I hate the companies that own these sites - I really would like to start my own. That is very interesting, Valerie. I was previously unaware of all of that. Not good. I am currently a member of OKCupid. I was wondering why I don't even receive a message back from a lot of the women. Great post! You are correct, I was wondering why I try and ask or just chat with ladies I am intrigued and find attractive and the noice is deafening: literally crickets.

Not all guys are bad apples but I can understand why they should be wary. I was married for 24 years; never abused her. Women these days are becoming faker than fake, nothing is real on them anymore. Their only primary goal in their life is to look pretty. Then it's all connected, you look pretty, find a man with wealth and possible good looks, or someone who has the alpha traits, and put up a family with them, in case it goes awry she can always claim material gain from him and most likely take the kid with them in case of divorce, because the system mostly favour the weaker, but is it really weaker sex?

No it's privileged sex. And they primarely fake their beauty, among other things. I think we've all seen by now how a potato can look like a princess with the aid of come colors and putty. They truly are shameless. Nothing is genuine about them. Sadly I have came to a point where I have almost zero respect for most them and their personality For this I will most likely never seen them as equals. I just woke up not long ago, from a sleep of reason, for my whole life I was brainwashed into beliveving what the media was telling us. The gentle sex, the poor sex, the defenseless sex, they need, we give.

But they rarely told us how truly ruthless creatures they are beneath that woman's skin there is a cold-blooded lizard. No offense to the cold-blooded lizards, because they are cooler than most women. Were will this lead us? I hope society is proud of what has done, because the war between sexes will most likely be the cause of our extincion! I stopped reading this when I got to the phrase "Women these days" I figured it was all downhill from there.

Agreed Scott. They're a lot of great ladies out there and a lot of good men also. Just weeding through the mess of cyber dating. The thing is there is absolutely too much fakery on dating sites that goes unpunished. I'm not even talking about the nasty scammers. No, besides some nasty users that infect and foreshadow the whole populace, I'm also talking about the greedy, repuslive technique these sites go for, to keep their customers.

And even making you incredible discounts, begging you to stay, they are pathetic. Well first of all this shit should all be free, nobody should profit from poor and lonely men and women with their souls laying on the floor in pieces, they are killing our love. We just want to find someone whom we'll click!


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Second, there is clearly a vision of economy and massive deceit behind this sites and their little detailed strategies on how to "steal" your money for everything you do on their site, nothing is free and they always think of new ways to deprive you of your money. I can sense the economist's brainstorming all the way here.

Third, it's literally brainwashing you, killing your love, feelings, humbleness. Fourth, avoid online dating like plague, and if you don't at least don't take it seriously, like it matters, until you meet in person, really don't do this like And fifth, we need customer protection, we need internet police, these scammers, as users and site owners just sholdn't be able to get away with this shit legally, no way. What example are we setting to others?!?


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  • Ask yourself! You are a whore. Let me explain, because of people like you, people, that are ignoring others that make an effort to contact you, and you, don't even have the decency to reply a thing - yeas because of people like you, good people also commit suicide. Very true. She alone is the problem with online dating. Not only can I confirm that she is vain useless trash, I can rest easy knowing she will burn painfully in hell for the issues that she has caused others in her lifetime.

    I feel sorry for people like this, honestly. This article and some of the comments make feel like I'm way different than the norm. I never message women first. I don't have to. I get a lot of interest. No I'm nothing special and in fact I'm a portly 50 something with hair to the middle of my back. I get a lot of women complimenting me on my profile and chatting me up. My profile only states what I'm interested in, what my hobbies are and what I won't put up with.

    I let the women make all the moves. They offer me their number, and they ask me out. They also are the first to start talking about their romantic interests. I have plenty of dates and more. Not all of these women are barbie dolls but I don't care and they know it up front. I love the conversation and attention and so do they. My main goal is to come across as friendly, polite and safe. If I'm so good at this then why am I still out there?

    Because I have pretty high expectations and I refuse to settle for less. I have started a few "relationships" only to find out that the woman I met wasn't the woman I was chatting with. Oh they are in the same body but someone stole the woman I was chatting with and substituted a sorry replacement. Until I find Ms right I'll keep enjoying the conversation and dating. I'm a good looking 6'1" muscled, athletic, green eyed guy that has no trouble attracting women in real life. I have a good job, own a home want kids. I work third shift and travel a lot. After talking for a while I ask them out.

    This is excluding the offers from gay men who messaged me more often then women I'm not gay and not interested. At this point I have sent out well thought out messages, in other words one a night for over three months on average. One was old enough to be my mother, I was probably in kindergarten when her picture was taken. I look young for my age so we didn't even look like a couple.

    Two were morbidly obese, I'm not looking for a super model but I'm also not looking for someone who can't climb a flight of stairs and is going to have major health issues, we lead completely different lifestyles, my profile states that I bicycled miles last summer and lists rock climbing, spelunking and kayaking as hobbies.

    Yes, we may read the same novels, but I do it on top of that foot cliff I climbed. One was married! Thought this was the one, and asked her for a second date, She wanted to go home with me. I told he I really don't want to move that fast, I don't' sleep around but once we got to know each other better. She said she really couldn't' as he husband would be back from a work trip..

    Um, seriously I think you might have mentioned that before accepting a date. I'm glad I didn't kiss her. I have a yearly membership as a patron so no added cost to me but still. Because of my lifestyle I have a choice between online dating and being single, at this point I'm being single. I joined a site and received hundreds of requests within two days.

    I was polite and friendly to all but all I got was disgusting offers. I have tried multiple on line dating sites. I have found there is no such thing as a free dating site, If you use your credit card your asking for trouble at your bank. Women only want your bank and your comments about sex are necessarily true. Women have said to me let's f It seems to be the same for all sites. Whatever happened to just meeting in public and talking. When I suggest this, the response is I am not perfect and yes I like sex, and a lot of it.

    But this never makes for a relationship or to me, show the thanks or appreciation I want to give to a woman. I want to hear her opinions, ides and thoughts. But they just want my genital size and bank account size. Nor as being innocent of their actions in seeking men. I have had some sick stuff from woman too. What do you think about all these sex sites and why so many??

    If you are not looking to get laid don't go there. If you are there, don't be surprised at some of the responses. Take a look in your own mirror. I can I have tried several of the sites above. Oh its great if you are some well off good looking guy. But us Joe Smoes out there get inboxes full of girls but we can't look at them until we pay up.

    The minute we do, suddenly no one talks to you. Online dating is for the well to do, smooth talkers, and the good looking. For guys who are genuine and respond to womens' profiles not just their pictures it would be nice to receive a reply such as, "Not feeling chemistry, but thanks for the message. The frustration of men comes from being earnest about responding thoughtfully and then getting no reply whatsoever. These men don't reply back nastily, but just accept that there won't be a reply. But it would be nice to get a reply either way. Some of us women do write well thought out messages and the men won't respond.

    I wonder if these dating sites use algorithms to block matched users from seeing each other unless one of them pays up. And the longer you pay them, the fewer matches you get. I've read other comments from users who said as soon as they're about to cancel, they get better matches.

    Some of these end up being fake profiles created by the company or stolen accounts from previous users. I think we're dealing with ransom level corruption with dating apps looking to turn a profit. On ok Cupid I once had a guy message me they wanted to dress up in a French maid costume and be my table. I kid you not. Interesting article but I do feel it's a bit one sided I just don't have a problem with that. For women it is a more pressing issue of safety.

    Anyway, I tried Match for a year. My view is it was a total waste of money not counting the value of learning that fact. I would say I'm a good guy but then again who wouldn't. For what it's worth, my experience was reading over profiles and I couldn't even guess on how many I viewed. Most of those were dreadful tripe or just plain lazy. Despite that I ended up sending about attempts to start a conversation in hopes of finding more substance.

    Most of these were along the lines of "Hello, I see you like art museums. Do you have a favorite artist or style? I'm a fan of impressionists and really like VanGogh. Would you care to talk a little? I deleted the income and everything but the Match solicitations ended. I ended with a shorter summary and no income. In the end I had 4 actual responses, about 15 read notifications without response and at least 2 solicitations from Match a day. Not a good percentage to be sure. Maybe I'm just a horrible guy but if not then I have a theory about what is going on.

    I'm thinking when Match started having the men pay so the women can read that the number of women with paid accounts dropped. Interesting to me that salary was a bigger driver than summary. I guess some women are just looking for a paycheck, I just didn't realize how many on Match were. Unfortunately I was trying to find a friend and partner in life.

    Maybe I will someday. Hopefully my experience will help other descent guys thinking of Match. Good luck all. Unfortunately I still am on Match. As my subscription ended I actually found someone that was talking to me. I didn't figure it was serious but we were talking and I liked that. I tried to send alternate means of keeping the conversation going with no luck. After the subscription ended I got several notifications of messages and finally decided it was worth the cash just to keep the pen pal.

    On renewing my account about 3 days I messaged her and she responded that I should renew so we could keep talking. When I told her I already had the conversation ended and she blocked me. My suspicion is that was some form of customer retention activity but maybe I am just paranoid. At this point I have stopped messaging women. I update my profile summary periodically and wait to see if anyone has interest in me so I feel I am not aggressively seeking anything.

    So far nothing and I don't expect there will be any until the subscription gets close to expiring. Hopefully I finally learned my lesson on that. I love the idea of finding someone that way but it is a fairy tale from what I have seen. Hopefully it's a fairy tale someone else gets to live. I like that idea. It's how it's been done since the dawn of man and still being done today. If you feel a computer and "profile" is some kind of required to find a truly loving relationship wishing you all the best with that attitude.


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    • I'm not saying you don't want to set yourself up, or go out to places where you could be noticed or approached. But it also happens when your not "desperately" chasing it either like people are online. Another reason I don't favor online dating is it sets most up with this "let me look for grass that might be greener on the side" type mentality. Strong relationships are built strong, seasoned and nurtured with time and care -- there is no grass is greener on the other side.

      Hannah, that's exactly the type of mentality that is ruining most of relationships. You gave it a perfect name. Yes, indeed most people are not willing to sacrifice or compromise anything for a good relationship nowadays, and always going on with that "the grass may be greener on the other side" type of mentality.

      It's horrible. You sound like someone whom many genuine women wish they could find. I have only just entered this online dating minefield.

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      I am slim and attractive and look after myself. Even then I responded politely in an effort to get the communication on a more respectful track. My boundaries then totally ignored. I hate to admit it, but I actually cried over these exchanges I felt so hurt. Pity the great guys are not connecting with the great women. What a shame. Not leaning towards the troubles women go through with online dating Yes, women must be on their guard I want to be in a relationship with someone who thinks about the future and knows where they want to be 5, 10, and even 20 years from now.

      I am interested in someone who can bring out the best in me and who will always strive to be better. I can make people smile and love to make my friends and family laugh. I am looking for someone that I can laugh and enjoy life with. You might be wondering what is so special about me. Do I own more than one pair of dress pants? Do I still watch cartoons?

      If you are the right person for me, I will always try to make you giggle and feel good about yourself. But why now? Why am I on a dating website? For one, I am tired of bringing strangers of the streets as my plus ones to social events. And sure, I feel like I might be missing out on something as each of my friends gets married and has kids. So if you think you could settle with someone as goofy as someone like myself, give me a buzz and we can see where this goes. I am an easygoing person looking for someone who I can spend time with.

      Someone with a laid-back attitude and great sense of humor is the perfect fit for someone like me. I am the type of person who is very flexible and likes to go with the flow. I am always open to new experiences. I am looking for someone who is ready to commit to a relationship and who I can be in perfect harmony with. I want someone who likes me and accepts me for who I am and I will return the favor. While I might not look like it at first glance, I will be the first person to admit that I am a sappy romantic at heart.

      From cheesy romantic comedy films to sleazy beach reads, I love a good love story. My friends would describe me as a person who is loyal, generous, and nurturing to others. Anyone who knows me knows that I love watching the Bachelor. It is absolutely my favorite show. Babies and puppies make my heart melt, but I can also be tough as nails when the situation calls for it.

      For me, the perfect relationship would be a passionate, whirlwind romance that is full of intimacy and trust. I would love to build an amazing life with the right person. As an individual who is in love with the world, I am someone who always tries to see the best in people.

      I am definitely an idealist who is always trying to help make the world a better place. Ideally, you think the same way as I do. I love traveling the world and helping those who are in need. My favorite time was when my school traveled to Guatemala to help build a school in a small village.

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      In my spare time I work in a soup kitchen and volunteer at an animal shelter. The cats are my favorite and if I could, I would take them all home with me. My perfect date involves hiking and bringing along a picnic. I am a wild card, a lover of life, and a citizen of the world who is looking for someone like me. I am looking for a person who will want to go on endless adventures and spontaneous road trips with me. For me, there is nothing quite like packing my bags, and stepping onto a plane, knowing that it will take me somewhere new.

      I love taking chances. My ideal partner is an explorer like me and is open to trying new things. I am an adrenaline junkie who loves to ride the craziest roller-coasters and raft down the most intense rapids. How does this translate on a personal level? In any relationship that I am in, I am passionate and I go all in.

      When I commit to someone, I am in it for the ride. No adventure is too small for this thrill seeker. On first impressions, I might come off as a little intense, but at the end of the day I am really just a down to earth guy who loves to experience new things. I hate doing the same thing every day and I am always trying to learn something new. Life it too short to not be out having fun. What's your current relationship status? Previous Next. What country are you in? What city would you like to find dates in? Which city do you live in?

      Please enter your zipcode. What's your current age? How old are the youngest men you'd like to meet? How old are the oldest men you'd like to meet? Which of these best describes your current dating situation? What's your current income level? What's your current income level CAD? What's your current income level GBP?

      What's your current income level AUD? If selected as a VIDA client, are you ready to try a unique approach to dating that has been proven to create high-quality matches? What's the best email address for our matchmaker to reach you? Do You Qualify? What kind of relationship are you seeking?

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